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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30053928">thus always to tyrants</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/HiBlue'>HiBlue (orphan_account)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alivebur, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bench Trio Supremacy, End of the World, Everyone Has Issues, Everyone Needs A Hug, Gen, Hopeful Ending, Minor Violence, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Ranboo &amp; TommyInnit Friendship (Video Blogging RPF), Revived TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Revived Wilbur Soot (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit Needs a Break (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit-centric (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot and TommyInnit are Siblings, especially wilbur he's really going through it, maybe the egg??, the Void makes a short reappearance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-16 03:14:59</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,292</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30053928</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/HiBlue</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It was only a matter of time before Dream escaped, Tommy knew. Even when he warned Sam, he knew that Sam didn’t listen. Or rather, that he didn’t know how to listen. The Warden was trapped in a cage of his own making, and the timer had started running the moment Tommy set foot outside the prison. </p>
<p>Then he saw a familiar figure standing outside his house, investigating the new roses Ranboo had planted outside. </p>
<p>Wilbur Soot, in the flesh.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dream &amp; TommyInnit, Ranboo &amp; TommyInnit, Ranboo &amp; Tubbo &amp; TommyInnit, Tubbo &amp; Tommyinnit, Wilbur Soot &amp; TommyInnit, captain Puffy &amp; Tommyinnit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>257</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. just a dog with no bite</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> It was only a matter of time before Dream escaped, Tommy knew. Even when he warned Sam, he knew that Sam didn’t listen. Or rather, that he didn’t know how to listen. The Warden was trapped in a cage of his own making, and the timer had started running the moment Tommy set foot outside the prison. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Then he saw a familiar figure standing outside his house, investigating the new roses Ranboo had planted outside. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Wilbur Soot, in the flesh. </p><hr/>
<p>Tommy was talking (arguing, really) with the Captain herself when he spotted Wilbur. </p>
<p>He faintly heard Captain Puffy curse, but all he could process was Wilbur, there. Wilbur, turning his head. Wilbur, wearing an ugly yellow jumper and carrying a mask (<em>that looks an awful lot like Dream’s</em>) in his hands and that stupid look in his eyes that Tommy remembered, the absolute <em> prick. </em></p>
<p>And he might’ve spoken, Tommy could see that Wilbur’s mouth was moving but all Tommy could hear was blood roaring in his ears, the world cascading into noise so loud that he couldn’t breathe—</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And he couldn’t, he couldn’t fucking hear anything or see anything but Wilbur’s voice in his fucking head in that awful place going on and on and on and</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Captain Puffy was tugging Tommy behind her, and Tommy could calm down a bit now that he was looking at the Captain’s red coat and fluffy white hair and not fucking <em> Wilbur. </em>“What the hell are you doing here, Wilbur?”, the Captain hissed. </p>
<p>“It’s a pleasure to see you again as well, Captain Puffy,” Wilbur replied evenly. “If you don’t mind, I came here to talk to Tommy, but I can come back later if right now is an inconvenient time, <em> Tommy.</em>” </p>
<p>Fucking damn that bastard to hell. And he thought this was going to be a good day. </p>
<p>Tommy could feel Captain Puffy bristling, and knew that she would begin a fight that she couldn’t win. Wilbur’s sharpest tool had always been his silver tongue, and he knew it had only gotten more lethal in the Void.</p>
<p>He couldn’t let this continue. Puffy didn’t deserve this. </p>
<p>“Puffy, you need to leave, and you need to tell the others to run <em> now, </em>” Tommy pulled his arm away from her grasp, shoving his trident into Puffy’s hands. </p>
<p>Captain Puffy looked at him in horror, shaking her head furiously. </p>
<p>“Tommy, no, this isn’t—” the Captain began, but Tommy rounded on her, hands gripped tightly onto her shoulders. </p>
<p>“I swear on Prime, Captain Puffy. Wilbur wouldn't kill <em> me,</em>" which was debatable, Tommy supposed, "But Wilbur here means <em> Dream’s </em> here, <em> Do you understand, Captain? </em>  Tubbo, Ranboo, fucking <em> all </em> of them, they are <em> not safe here </em> . People are going to die, Captain.”</p>
<p>Tommy pressed a water bucket into her hands and pushed her gently in the direction of Snowchester. <br/>
<br/>
</p>
<p>“Puffy, <em>please. </em>I need you to go. <em>Now.</em>”</p>
<p><br/>
And the look on his face must have convinced her of <em> something, </em>because she stiffened and took off sprinting to the nearest water tower. She turned her head at the last minute to yell a few indistinct words at him before flying away on the trident. </p>
<p>Tommy’s hands were shaking, but he managed to keep his face still as he walked towards Wilbur. This was the absolute fucking shittest day.</p><hr/>
<p>Captain Puffy leaped from tower to tower, beelining straight towards the Prison. There were a thousand thoughts racing through her head, a thousand decisions and regrets in such a short span of time that Puffy was still reeling. She hesitated, on the verge of sprinting back to Tommy. What the fuck had she been thinking? There was no way that leaving Tommy alone with Wilbur was the right thing to do, <em>especially </em>after what Tommy had revealed. </p>
<p>And then she looked up, and the sight that greeted her wiped all her thoughts clear from her head. </p>
<p>"What the <em>fuck</em> happened here?" </p><hr/>
<p>“Where the fuck’s Dream, Wilbur?” Tommy snapped. </p>
<p>“Tommy, I’m not working with Dream. What in the everloving Prime are you on about?” Wilbur asked, his head cocked to the side.</p>
<p>It was a lie, from a liar, lying. He hadn’t exactly expected a straight answer from Wilbur, but some weak little part of Tommy still trusted Wilbur without reserve, still managed to feel stung with disappointment.</p>
<p>Dream might’ve been the devil, but Wilbur was the one who had committed the original sin. </p>
<p>Wilbur could lie to his heart’s content, but if there was one thing he knew, it was that Dream would come around searching for him, especially now that he was free. </p>
<p>If Wilbur wanted to play it the long way round, Tommy would follow his lead.</p>
<p>“Let’s take a little walk, shall we?” Tommy responded noncommittally, turning away and walking towards the ruins of L’Manberg. He didn’t need to turn around to know that Wilbur would be following close behind him. </p>
<p>The air was still as the two carefully climbed their way down into the glass floor covering the L’Manhole, with only errant grunts and huffs cutting through the silence. </p>
<p> “Things have certainly changed around here. Very...red, I should say.” Wilbur said dismissively, but Tommy saw the way he eyed the charred rubble below their feet, the way the red vines curled around the tattered L’Manburg flag. </p>
<p>Fucking hell. </p>
<p>“You have your buddy Dream and Technoblade to thank for that, you do.” Tommy responded, finally turning to face Wilbur. </p>
<p>“Matter of fact, I think they did it specifically in your honor!” Tommy added, a bitter edge creeping into his voice. </p>
<p>“Tommy, I already told you, I’m not working with Dream. And he isn’t my fucking <em> buddy </em>—” Wilbur spat the word like a curse. “What I am doing—whatever I plan to do, Tommy. It is completely of my own volition.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Tommy stared pointedly at the porcelain mask still hanging loosely from Wilbur’s hand. “Yeah, Wilbur? And what’re you planning on doing, then?” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“This server’s cursed, Tommy. I’ve been thinking about it since you left—Mexican Dream sends his regards, by the way—and I still stand by what I said, but the infection’s gone too deep for this server, Tommy.” Wilbur took a deep breath, and slowly let it out. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We need to destroy the server, Tommy. There’s rot in the very air we’re breathing, this land is <em> cursed.</em>” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Tommy saw the flames dancing in Wilbur’s eyes once more and for a moment, he could smell gunpowder in the air again. Again and again, Wilbur could never quite give it up, that the world didn’t need to be a fucking fairytale to be worth living in. </p>
<p>“That what you told Dream, Wilbur? Honestly, he seemed a lot more keen on controlling this place then destroying it—I’ll be real with you, he’d probably kill you dead if he heard the way you’re talking now,” Tommy finally replied, looking down at his feet. “Listen, Wilbur, I get you’re all pissy that you got revived and shit, I was too! But you’re going to have to reel it in if you want anyone to take you serious, pal.” </p>
<p>Wilbur shook his head impatiently, a look of frustration clear on his face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No, you’re not listening to me, Tommy. I know you’re smarter than this, <em> don’t </em> go acting like you forgot everything I told you in the Void. Like you didn’t see it either, Tommy, <em> please. </em>” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Wilbur stopped then and looked at Tommy, his eyes almost pleading for some kind of understanding from <em> him, </em> of all people. There was a time where Wilbur knew Tommy, could read him like an open book. It always annoyed the fuck out of Tommy, before. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You told me a lot of things, Wilbur,” Tommy finally replied after a slow pause. “And I already fucking said what I thought.” </p>
<p><br/>
Wilbur’s expression immediately closed down, and Tommy could just about see the gears turning in his head, running through his little script of justifications. </p><hr/>
<p>Tubbo had been in the middle of wrangling a second chicken for Michael when Captain Puffy descended onto Snowchester like death was on her heels. "Tubbo, the damn—Wilbur's been revived, and Tommy's alone with him." Tubbo froze and turned slowly to face the Captain. </p>
<p>"You left him alone with <em>Wilbur</em>, Captain Puffy?" A second voice rang out from behind Tubbo. Ranboo walked out in front of him, sword drawn at the ready. </p>
<p>Captain Puffy's eyes narrowed into slits at the sight of the blade, but she stood her ground firmly. </p>
<p>"Tommy told me to come here to tell you guys to <em>run. </em>And I'm here to tell you guys that if you want to keep Michael safe, one of you guys need to take him and get the dodge out of town <em>now.</em>" Captain Puffy hissed. "Tubbo, Ranboo, listen to me. The Prison is compromised, I saw it, it's crawling with the Eggpire's men." </p>
<p>The captain turned and cast a discerning eye over Snowchester, her gaze lingering on the small figure that was peeking out through one of the mansion's second-foor windows. </p>
<p>"It is very, <em>very </em>likely that Dream has escaped. I don't know what kind of plan you guys had, but make your decisions and make them now."</p><hr/>
<p> <br/>
“You’re just hurting people, is all. That’s all it comes down to, isn’t it?” Tommy finished quietly, even as he saw Wilbur’s mouth draw back into a bitter smirk. </p>
<p>“Of course you’d think it was that easy, you <em> child,” </em>and Tommy couldn’t help the sharp laugh that tore out of his throat, because he’d already lived through this story.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yes, I actually do think it’s <em> that easy, </em>dickhead. I’m not—I don’t have to listen to you, actually, in fact, <em> you </em> listen to <em> me </em>, yeah?” Tommy stopped, waiting for Wilbur to scoff and walk away. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>But no, to Tommy’s faint surprise, he stayed, his body so still you could’ve mistaken it for a statue. Wilbur took in a slight breath, his mouth oddly jerking up at the edges. Alright. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>You want a show? You’ll get a fucking show, <em> bitch. </em> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You really think you can go fuck up this server and just leave without seeing exactly <em> what the fuck you and Dream did, Wilbur </em>?” Tommy snarled, his teeth bared at him in some mockery of a smile. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Tommy slid a knife out of his inventory, raised its sharp edge of it right above the rabbit-heart pulse in his neck. He could see Wilbur’s eyes widen, how he could see in real time Wilbur’s face distort into some weirdly constipated expression and Tommy <em> knew </em>he wouldn’t like what Wilbur was opening his mouth to say. Tommy just pressed the knife closer to his skin, and saw how Wilbur froze. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He could feel the blood rushing to his head, could feel exactly how the blade was going to cut into his paper frail skin, could hear the enchantments on the metal hum in anticipation. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Just <em> tell </em> me, Wilbur. You must’ve known—” Tommy pressed harder, harder and then felt a sharp, hot pain bloom from his neck. A thin ribbon of blood appeared on Wilbur’s neck, mirroring his own. The fuck? Tommy gritted his teeth and pushed on.  “You <em> must’ve </em>known, and I don’t know how the hell you thought this was going to end.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’ve just told me you’re trying to destroy this fucking server, and this time you were going to take <em> everyone </em>down with you, weren’t you, Wilbur?” Tommy whispered. He understood now, Tommy knew. This was Wilbur's plan, and Tommy knew now what it was he had to do. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Something like fear flitted across Wilbur’s face, leaving just as quickly as it came. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Tommy, I’m going to need you to <em> put that knife down </em>, do you hear me? Tommy, listen to me—”.  </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re going to try to kill me and every last fucker on this server, aren’t you? You fucking, you fucking, you don’t fucking care. You couldn’t give less of a shit,” Tommy heard himself say faintly, his voice brittle and tinny in the open air. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Wilbur was the smartest man in the world, didn’t Dream say? Spent ages in the Void uncovering the secrets of the goddamned universe. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“So tell me how this story ends, then, <em> Wilbur. </em> Your unfinished symphony, it’s been burned, razed to the fucking core of this <em> world, </em>” Tommy gestured wildly around him with his free hand.  “You got what you fucking wanted, didn’t you?” Tommy said hoarsely. His hand was shaking so badly, but he needed to keep the knife close to his neck, needed Wilbur to take him seriously for once in his fucking life. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You said to me, <em> you said to me, </em> that you don’t even want to fucking <em> be here </em> , Wilbur. And you, you and fucking <em> Dream— </em> you don’t care. You don’t care. And you know what, fine. But you need to understand that whatever the fuck you plan on doing to this damned server, <em> I have nothing else, Wilbur.” </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>There it was. Tommy had no more cards left to play. And if Wilbur didn’t give in, well, then Tommy would end this story on his own goddamned terms. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“TOMMY!” </p>
<p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>i'll be completely honest, i've got an idea of where this is headed but I don't know if it's coming across well enough. Comments and critiques are more than welcome and will absolutely make my day, I promise you. Hope y'all enjoyed, if you're actually interested in how this story will go please tell me :) so i know if this plot is worth continuing or not :) please :) thank you :)</p><p>Edit: dang I curse a lot</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. like a boat into oblivion</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>A lot of words are spoken, but nothing is heard. Tommy and Wilbur have a lot of unresolved issues, and Ranboo and Captain Puffy are just along for the ride, until they're not. Ranboo discovers that Tommy unironically commits martyrdom every business week.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A sharp cry rang out, a familiar voice filled with worry that Tommy faintly noted as safe; but neither of the pair looked away from the other. There was no room for error or interruption now, not with what was at stake. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Tommy, what the hell are you doing?” The lanky hybrid sprinted over to Tommy’s side, his voice more agitated than he’d ever heard. Tommy reckoned the second pair of footsteps following behind was Captain Puffy, a guess that was affirmed by the muttered curses that came as the implications of the scene before the new arrivals sank in. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I don’t give a single <em> fuck, </em>Wilbur. My life or the server. I know you wouldn’t like having that on your conscience, eh?” Tommy spit. Tommy saw Wilbur rear back like he was burned with a savage satisfaction. Didn’t like that, did he? </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You fucking child, you couldn’t even <em> comprehend </em> just how wrong you are about everything. This is so you <em> won’t </em> die, you utter <em> buffoon </em>,” Wilbur snarled back, his eyes glued onto the knife that was poised over Tommy’s neck. Wilbur’s hands were half-outstretched towards Tommy, even though they were a fair bit out of reach. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>If Wilbur tried to go for the knife, Tommy would sink it straight in. He was terrified of pain, terrified of what could go wrong, how  It would go in smoothly, he’d spent ages enchanting it and it—and he would— Prime, was he really about to do this? <em> Could </em>he do this? </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Tommy took another glance at Wilbur, made sure he could see the resoluteness in his eyes. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Don’t fucking patronize me, Wilbur.” Tommy replied back. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He knew pain, knew it like the back of his hand just how much his fear of it consumed him like a raging fire. He knew death, the memory and the feel of it scored into the very depths of his mind. There were a thousand swords pointed at his neck, a thousand threats whispering and screaming, but for this once he was one of them. Tommy was always so gods-damned scared these days. Scared for the people he cared about, scared for what the future held and so fucking scared of what he was (<em> and what he couldn’t be. </em>) </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Tommy knew one thing though. He would do anything to preserve what fragile peace Tubbo had conjured in the wake of all the destruction that had been left behind from Tommy and Dream’s struggles. That was something he could keep constant in his heart, could believe in the stead of his own fantastical wishes. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>And now Dream was back and Wilbur was just proving with every word that left his mouth just how little he had changed. Just how much he had regressed. But clearly there was still something of the human left in him—or the coward, he didn’t really care— that wasn’t willing to see Tommy kill himself right in front of him. And damn it all, he would use that for all it was worth. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He could sense Ranboo wavering in confusion, saw Captain Puffy look seconds away from tackling Tommy to the ground, so he knew he had to speak quickly. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well, Wilbur? Explain how sending the entire <em> fucking </em>server to kingdom come could possibly end with me not dead? Explain why I shouldn’t just—” Tommy choked on his words, settling just for glaring at Wilbur with clear intent.  </p>
<p> </p>
<p>A gentle hand landed on Tommy’s shoulder, and if it weren’t for the fact that Tommy was focused on faking out Wilbur, he would’ve shoved it off so fast because <em> no one could touch him—  </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Uh, Tommy, I’m not really sure what’s going on. But I don’t think, I <em> really </em>don’t think that this is the right move.” Ranboo said in a nervous voice, even though he didn’t make a move towards the knife. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ranboo, pal, I’m kind of in the middle of negotiating the end of the world here. Didn’t you just hear me? You mind fucking off to Tubbo or something?” Tommy bit back. He did not have the time to justify himself to all the dumbasses who didn’t <em> know </em>Wilbur, and Ranboo was at the very top of that list. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ranboo, is it? Can you tell the child to <em> put that bloody knife down </em>?” Wilbur said in a steely voice, his gaze now firmly fixed on a half-enderman whose grip had suddenly tightened around Tommy’s shoulder. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Tommy could feel Ranboo’s gaze boring holes into the back of his skull, a silent question on his lips. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ranboo, the man before you is a madman. He is going to hurt you. He is going to hurt Tubbo. <em> He is going to hurt Michael. </em> Do not fucking listen to him, because he <em> will </em>lie to you.” Tommy said lowly, shifting to shield Ranboo from Wilbur. Which probably wasn’t very effective, considering the beanpole was a head and a half taller than he was. Either way, Ranboo had gone rigid, likely from eye-contact overload with Wilbur. Idiot. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Captain Puffy edging her way towards Wilbur. Tommy didn’t know what she was planning, but he immediately switched tracks to distracting Wilbur. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Don’t talk to him like I’m not here, you fucker. In fact, don’t fucking talk to Ranboo at all. This is between you and me, Wilbur. I’m still waiting for your answer. In fact, you <em> were </em>right, Wilbur. Me and you, we were never any fucking good for the server.” A wave of nausea hit Tommy at those words, but he kept on going. Captain Puffy was almost behind Wilbur, and her hand was hovering right above her sword. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Let’s make an agreement, me and you! A business deal, one might even call it!” Tommy said hysterically. “You want to go out in a blaze of glory again, don’t you? This time I’ll go with you! I’ll do you one better than some shit TNT, I’m gonna take you out with a bloody <em> nuke </em>!” At that, Ranboo seemed to break out of his fugue and started making frantic warbling sounds that sounded like some kind of fucked up English. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“There’s no way you have a fucking nuke, you absolute child! What the hell has gotten <em> into </em>you?” Wilbur said in a huff of exasperation, his eyes now sharp on Ranboo who seemed to be freaking out way harder than he needed to be at just the mere mention of nukes, Jesus. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That is, unless you—” Wilbur was abruptly cut off as Captain Puffy slammed the butt of her sword into the back of Wilbur’s head. Twin waves of pain split through his head, and then the world blanked out on Tommy. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Tommy blinked his eyes again and for some reason he was half on the ground, half propped up against Ranboo, who was running his claws worriedly over his head. There’s a ringing pain in the back of his head. His knife is gone, probably spirited away into Ranboo’s inventory. Tommy turns his head and there’s Wilbur, bound and trussed like a fucking turkey. The captain had managed to stuff his mouth with a frankly filthy looking rag, and Wilbur’s face looked incandescent with rage.  </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What the fuck.” Tommy said flatly. Captain Puffy came into view, her face grim. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’d like to say the same to you, kiddo. What the hell were you thinking?” Captain Puffy snarked back, her expression stormy with anger and confusion. “And why did you pass out as well?” The captain looked back and forth between Wilbur and Tommy, and then walked towards Wilbur, aiming a sharp kick at his side. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Instantly, Tommy doubled over in pain, while Wilbur’s lack of reaction seemed to surprise the man himself, before understanding and horror filled his eyes. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Mother<em> fucker, </em>” Tommy choked out, reeling from both his swimming head and the thrumming ache in his side. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re like his little pain voodoo doll,” Ranboo marveled. “Which is not ideal, of course,” the half-enderman rushed to reassure Tommy. Tommy weakly slapped at Ranboo, but sadly missed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“There are many, many things going on, and I think there’s been some severe miscommunication,” Captain Puffy said calmly, a squirming Wilbur thrown over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ranboo, get Tommy away from here and keep an eye on your comm. We’re going to need to move fast, and we’re going to be too slow in a group of four. I think the Eggpire is finally making their move.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>At that, Captain Puffy leaped away with Wilbur, leaving Ranboo and Tommy to look awkwardly at each other. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“So, uh, you wanna do a piggyback or a princess carry? I could honestly do the princess carry, you’re not all that heavy,” Ranboo broke the brief silence. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Fuck off, Ranboo.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Or you could walk, walking’s healthy!”</p><hr/>
<p>“You want to talk about that whole—” Ranboo drew a line across his neck meaningfully, “—thing you were trying to do with Wilbur?” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The mismatched pair was huddled awkwardly in a small room, dug into the side of the sewers. It was dank and cold, furnished only with rickety wooden chairs and a spindly table. There were a few lanterns and torches lit around the room, but the pervasive chill wiped away any warmth they might have provided</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They had agreed to hide in the sewer system. More escape routes, or something along those lines. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I don’t have to fucking explain myself to you, Ranboo.” Tommy groused, fiddling with the comm in his hand. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well, I don’t necessarily disagree with that, but I’ve gotta admit, I don’t think Tubbo would be happy to hear about you threatening your life for the server.” Ranboo gingerly opened a chest that was tucked in the corner, and drew out a handful of dirt and string clumped together. Lovely. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ranboo liked Tommy, he actually did. He reminded Ranboo a little of what he imagined a pet raccoon would be like. Prickly and vicious at any perceived danger, but strangely affectionate when he thought no one else would see. But the longer Ranboo knew Tommy, the more bewildered he became. It seemed as though his way of resolving conflict more often than not just resulted in Tommy losing, well, everything.  </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well, Tubbo is actually in no position to be upset about <em> anything </em> I choose to do, <em> especially </em> that.” Tommy’s brow was furrowed in concentration as he typed furiously into the comm, tapping impatiently on the table as he waited for a response. “Ranboo, did the captain send anything to you?” Tommy looked up at Ranboo, his eyes questioning. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ranboo took out his comm, and had to do a double take at what he saw. “This Wilbur character is really insistent on seeing Tommy again,” Ranboo read out, grimacing at the look on Tommy’s face. “He, uh, he refuses to talk unless Tommy’s there, and he says that he’s the only one who knows how to take Dream down for good. I don’t think this guy’s all that right in the head, but I think—” Ranboo peered closer at the comm, making sure he said the next few words out of his mouth <em> very very carefully.  </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>“She thinks <em> what </em>?” Tommy urged him on, his eyes narrowed in suspicion. Ranboo suppressed a shiver of foreboding as he read out the rest of the message. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I think that Wilbur is genuinely trying to do right by Tommy and the rest of the server, and that you should come and meet up with us right now. We’re at my base. Hurry.” Ranboo finished, only to see a glowering Tommy pacing furiously up and down in front of him. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What the hell did Wilbur—never mind that, now we <em> have </em>to go to her now. He’s already managed to brainwash her in, what, thirty minutes?” Tommy raised his head to scan Ranboo with a critical eye, his eyes running over Ranboo’s armor, the glimmering trident and sword strapped to his side, and even his ears, for some strange reason. Tommy nodded knowingly to himself. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Alright, Ranboo, here’s what’s going to happen,” Tommy began, a strange gleam in his eyes. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ranboo didn’t think he was going to like what was going to happen. </p><hr/>
<p>Coming up next: </p>
<p>
  <em>"Last time I trusted Wilbur, he tried to blow me and L'Manburg up to a shitty poem he wrote in his head," Tommy whispered harshly to Ranboo. "You can believe whatever you like, and I'll even follow your lead, big man. I'm done." Tommy glanced over to Wilbur and glanced back at Ranboo, his hands still twitching at the knife strapped at his waist. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>"But don't forget, now. If he bleeds, I bleed. If I die, he dies. Do you understand me? " </em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>the plot's going to pick up more now. never fear, for your Captain's here, and she's going to fuck some shit up!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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